As I burn apart

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as I burn

Take it, take it all, but,give me back the person I used to be, give me back my dreams, give me back my inner peace. At the least,those wings you chopped off from mine. Or else, You better should have stabbed me to death. My brain is burning, My soul sintered, but i promise myself, never again, not for you, not for any one else, you indeed have burned me. Your sin, was but the strangling of mine, as you laugh,your sins are burning my skin, plucking out my ribs, shaking my palms relentlessly, your lies are grinding my bones.You have entrapped me in to my own fortress of introversion. Don’t laugh at me, Let me die in peace, And be reborn.


Soul speak 2

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എന്റെ പ്രണയം നിന്നോടല്ല,
കാരണം മഞ്ഞിലും മഴയത്തും,
ഞാൻ ഓര്ത്തത്‌ നിന്നെയയിരുന്നില്ല.
എഴുത്തിനെ ആയിരുന്നു,
ഇരുട്ടിലും മൂകതയിലും ഞാൻ തേടിയത്
എഴുത്തിനെ ആയിരുന്നു,
എഴുത്തായിരുന്നു എന്റെ പ്രണയിനി,
തലച്ചോറിൽ അഗ്നി പടർന്ന നിമിഷങ്ങളിൽ,
ആശ്വാസത്തിന്റെ നുറുങ്ങു വെട്ടം,
റേഷൻ ഏർപ്പെടുത്തിയ ബോണ്ട്‌ പേപ്പറും,
മഷി പേനയും ആയ ഏതോ ഒരു നിമിഷം,
ഞാൻ വേദനയോടെ തിരിച്ചറിഞ്ഞു,
എന്റെ ആശ്വാസം നിന്നിൽ അല്ല,
എഴുത്തിൽ ആയിരുന്നു.
എഴുത്തായിരുന്നു എന്റെ പ്രണയം.


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I am not a slave because I READ,
I am not a slave because I CAN UNDERSTAND,
I am not a slave because I CAN REFLECT,
I am not a slave because I AM NOT IGNORANT,
I am not a slave because I CAN THINK,
I am not a slave because I AM NOT NESCIENT,
I am not a slave because I AM CONSCIOUS,
I am not a slave because I SPEAK UP,
I am not a slave because I AM AWAKE.


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I stay awake this night,

Though caffeine runs through my veins,

And my brain floats in the air,

Curses and Enchantments are broken,

Spell bound I struggle through this night,

Eyes red caught in fire,

And my mind race like a Wolf,

A two faced black wolf leap through the air,

I breath slowly as the wolves slay fate and Despair,

As I am set free in dimensions,

Grit grow larger like a jinn,

And my inner voice whisper to move on,

That yesterdays don’t define me,

Telling life as it is driven by a mysterious force,

A force of might and pain,

Which shreds the blood and gore,

Of the past which has no soul,

And telling Life is defined by,

The unknown tonight and tomorrows,

Which are set free in my perceptions,

And I am ready to find a reason,

A little word called dreams.

A reason to make me happy everyday.


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In the deepness of my mind,

There is thunder,firestorm and silence.

As I walk towards the unknown,

I am the  Knight and I am the Serpent,

Through this compelling duality through which I walk,

And the wizard will frantically dance to the end of this night,

As the reflections and reverberations of my past,

Are Emerged and incinerated in this wave of insight,

A fire of grit born in my struggle,

As I walk  tranquilly,

There is olive,roses and grape wine.

In both sides of my path,

Where there is butterflies,bees and sparrows.

I am blessed,

This night I am reborn.

(The fourth anniversary of Ink,thoughts,coffee…my deepest gratitude to all my readers.)

: )


The departure

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And today I board the train again,

That in some moments will take me long away,

Far away from all melancholy and the revulsions,

The shadows of the past i strive to leave behind,

As I have been struggling for a long time,

Strangled and ruined inside voids and tormented in to the vacuums,

And the things were berserk and complicated in existence,

And weeks and days seemed like mere survivals,

Like adrenaline or morphine and aspirin,

Randomized unstable linear series of labyrinths and chaos,

Like the acrid ice meltingly dry as it hovers over the fire,

Impatient and aggravated I am right at this moment,

But through every moment I am hopeful too,

To see a black puffy engine in the horizon,

Peering through the chilling bleached grey snow

As I continue to abide at this second platform,

And I shut my eyes trying to focus and forgive,

To forget and to let go off the acidic thoughts,

About aching moments and hallucinogenic halos,

From the oppressive days I seek relief,

My breath is flawlessly broad and steady,

As the ghosts of the past hover over my consciousness,

Like the dark evil hallows around snow clad hallway,

Brunt bashing to outcast the peaceful silence,

To which I desperately try to drag my mind,

Pursuing for a good reason to tell myself,

To heal the deep wounds imbued into my heart,

And in few moments my last resort will come,

To save me from all the sickening vagueness,

The days will be sunny again one day,

And then one day I will find the harmony,

I have been yearning to figure out,

Sooner or later I will be home…

The Relief

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We think everything will be ok,

We think everything will be over one day,

Yet we forgot to think about everything,

As the journey gets longer under the sun,

And the clock ticks gently through the time,

We forgets to think who we really are,

And we believes in something,

Lies covered in hatred and ego,

And the pain weights out of pride,

Always Everyday and each moment,

When the scars gets deeper and darker,

And we wish to scream like ghosts,

As we go dwell in between things,

Inducing wellness in to the fatigue,

And each day will appear like another liability,

As we forgot living the god  blessed life,

The chaos will fill our mind’s voids ,

Like the lamb black smudging over glass,

We will start hating the ghost of  our pasts,

As it follow us and byte like snakes,

And soon the dawn will be dark,

The evenings will be silent and cloudy,

And where should the faith remain ?

Where should the hope survive ?

Or is it just life?

Why does the dear god condemn on  us ?

When he promised us love and mercy,

Our minds sinks in to questions,

Question with no answers to tell,

And we have answers within our minds,

With no queries  to assume,

Time is the only answer,

Hope is the only relief…